Story of Her

For the Love of Men

By Rachel Monique Maskell

For the Love of Men

When I set out to do Jan Story Circle with the theme Beauty of Him, I had no idea so many more things would be put in motion with #timesup and the Golden Globes. I had no idea some women would be so visceral and angry. But it happened. And I learned. I was exposed to the depth of pain so great that even discussing what we like about men was seen as an attack to the solidarity of sisterhood.


So why would I do it? What was the point other than to stir up the pot?


To begin with, I have a husband who I love and admire. Things aren’t always rainbows and sunshine and that’s not his fault. Often it’s the challenges of having my shadow, my mirror, reflected back on me. And vice versa.


What I have learned in my 12 years of being with him is that if I want more love, appreciation, respect, recognition from him I have to positively reinforce those behaviors. I have to celebrate them and celebrate him. Like most people, and dogs, we respond better when praised for what we do well than being yelled at for all the shit we do that’s “wrong.”


In understanding this about my own relationship and extrapolating out I think we can all do better (men and women) to applaud and celebrate each other for all the amazing things we do so we will do more of them.


I certainly don’t condone the poor behavior and the patriarchal paradigm we’ve been held under for way too many centuries. But I also hear that men are lost. Some are afraid to speak to women now. They’re not sure what to say or how to engage. And yes, they’re afraid of the backlash.


“So what,” you may ask?


For all the male bashing and anger towards this sex I know equally, if not more, women are looking for a partner in their life that they can connect with. That will support them, love them, protect them...characteristics mostly attributed towards men. How are we going to get more of what we want if we keep focusing on what we hate?


If you’re reading this and are still fuming at my audacity to share the value of loving on the positive attributes of men, then consider the perspective of the masculine and feminine balance within us all.


We are each born of a mother and a father (egg and sperm). Although the woman carries much of the genetic code there is still input from the male. From a Jungian perspective they talk about the anima and the animus, the female and male archetypes respectively.


We each carry a component of the anima and animus. Women less of the animus than men but it is there. The animus is also considered the yang which is said to have characteristics of directness, movement, action, etc. I like to think of how the sperm moves to reach the egg - focused, swimming against the odds, but determined.


And we need this energy. We need this energy to create change. We need this energy to work in harmony with the Divine Feminine.


To me it is less about the people and more about the frequency. How are we choosing to show up day to day, moment to moment to embody our truth and engage in the energy that is needed, right now.


Full disclosure, celebrating men and the Divine Masculine is not the full solution to the problem. It’s a start. There are many things within the constructs and paradigms of our society that need to be broken down and recreated. Starting in the home. We have to rethink the individual family each fighting for the time and space to work and fulfill our dreams and passions as individuals. The system is broken.


But what if by taking a step to acknowledge what is ‘right’ what is ‘good’ we can take a step closer to solving the chasm between the sexes?


Women, there is much healing that still needs to be done. But expecting the men to take the lead on this we will lose out. It is time now to embrace our differences so we can learn to be equals.


To help me move through the BS in my own life I am taking a stand on what I love about men so I can invest in it. For myself, for my family, and for my future.


You can join me if you’re in LA or NYC at Feminine Weapon Day on Jan 30th. Or simply join the conversation here. Share your thoughts, your outrage, or your tools for making the shift happen.


xoxo

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It’s Beyond Babies

By Rachel Maskell

It’s Beyond Babies
The more I read, the more I sit in circle with women, the more I realize that motherhood is beyond having babies. Motherhood is about creating, caring, nurturing… aspects of what I believe to be a natural state of woman.

By tuning in to the Great Cosmic Mother and being in communion with her we can learn what mamahood really means.

I recently had a chance to delve into this with Molly Ades and Laura Kyttanen of Lady Boss Mamas. We discuss motherhood, my latest failure and why I’m embracing it. Bonus: I spin the Wheel and they talk about whatever it lands on.

Tune in if your a mama or not. Then let me know what you think of mamahood and what it means to be a woman. Cant wait to hear!


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Telling HerStory on Females in Fine Fettle

By Rachel Maskell

Telling HerStory on Females in Fine Fettle

If you’ve heard me speak recently you likely have heard me on fire about our pre-HIS-story. I’ve recently finished a few books on this topic, one of which is The Great Cosmic Mother: rediscovering the religion of the earth. To say it was life changing is an understatement. 

It has helped me to heal on many levels and is fueling a lot of my work right now. So when Dr Michelle of Females in Fine Fettle invited me to speak on her podcast, I was amped. The timing of the show coincided with a recent Story Circle and the finishing of the Great Cosmic Mother. Essentially, I had A LOT to say. 

In listening back you can hear the passion and excitement in my voice. And I know that this is just the beginning.  I believe HerStory is fundamental to our health and well being and for forging a better future for humanity.

I know. It’s a big statement. But when every question of my life has been answered as a woman through this book, I can’t help but make big statements.

Onward we go!

 

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Learning to Communicate

By Rachel Maskell

Learning to Communicate

Communication is one of those skills that we’re never really taught. If we’re lucky enough we go on a journey when we’re older and discover what it means to really communicate. And if we’re even more fortunate if we have a partner in our life that help us on this journey.


In today’s Story of I talk about my journey with communication as it relates to my husband. There have been so many wonderful challenges that have lead to positive growth and change. It hasn’t always been easy but I’m grateful for the experience.  

Watch below for the full story. 

 

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Beauty from a Different View

By Rachel Maskell

Beauty from a Different View

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I think that’s true in a few ways. One, the obvious, but the other is that we don’t see ourselves the way others see us. I tend to see myself through the lens of judgement and shame. And it’s been a lot of work to get me to where I am today.

Which is why in this week's Story if Her I talk about beauty from a different view. And mostly it’s an inside job. 

Check out the full story below. 

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Story of Her: we are all mothers

By Rachel Maskell

Story of Her: we are all mothers
This week’s Wheel of Themes, landed on Mamahood. I recognize this is a topic that many women may not think applies to them and if that is you I am going to ask that you set this belief aside for a few minutes and hear me out.

Mamahood is more than just giving birth and raising human babies. It’s about our capacity to create. And this is no small thing.

This is why I have paired the crown chakra with motherhood. Because I believe the apex of our existence is the ability to create, which is what ties us back to the Great Mama herself. We are all mothers, and I would even include our men on that!





What do you think about mamahood? Do you agree that we are all mothers with our ability to create? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

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Story of Her with Jenna Anton

By Rachel Maskell

Story of Her with Jenna Anton
Makeup. It’s not something I’m that confident with in wearing, or understanding how to utilize it effectively. I love the idea of play and obviously is necessary for theatrics and on-camera moments, but what about daily life? Does wearing makeup mean we don’t think we are beautiful naturally?

I have all these questions and curiosities around makeup, and figured I wasn’t alone. So in today’s Story of Her I sit down and chat with makeup artist Jenna Anton.

Jenna is radiant and her approach is all about enhancing our natural beauty. We talk about her journey, finding the right balance with makeup, and what a ‘five-minute’ face looks like. Spoiler alert...I am not wearing any makeup at the start of the show. Talk about vulnerable! 

Jenna Anton is represented by Forward Artists. Check out her stunning portfolio here. You can follow and connect with her on beauty and makeup @jennaantonmakeup

What about you? What is your journey with makeup? Do you feel like you have a healthy relationship with makeup and beauty? Would love to hear your feedback and questions in the comments below.

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Story of Her: My Body My Sex

By Rachel Maskell

Story of Her: My Body My Sex

In this week’s Story of Her, I talk about sex. I think it’s a topic that can finally be spoken about thanks to pioneers like Esther Perel.

And because we can finally talk about it, I hope that we can change the way that we’ve been taught about sex and our bodies. That we can acknowledge that we are designed for pleasure not just procreation. That we have hormonal rhythms and patterns that affect our sexuality.

And why am I learning about all of this now as a 30 something?

Check out the full story below:

This month's Story Circle topic is sex too...so if it's a theme you're keen to explore join us November 15th. Find all the details and RSVP here

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