It’s my third year going to Burning Man. I’m not a veteran but obviously there is a reason I keep going back. It’s not the cheapest of experiences, it takes a good chunk of time to organize and be offline and away, and the conditions are intense...so why?
I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately since we are just a few days away from landing on the playa. There has been many conversation about what it’s like and of course why I go so I thought I would share in today’s video.
If I were to answer with one word I would say FREEDOM. Freedom from what and why? Well, for that you’ll have to watch the video, but before I go there are many reasons that make Burning Man a special place. Many of which I don’t mention in the video. If you’re curious then definitely check out the 10 Principles of Burning Man to understand why.
Some people make Motherhood look easy or glamorous. Some women can be back in their skinny jeans within weeks. Or back to work running around like nothing's changed.
That's cool and all but not all women have the same story. For some of us the transition into Motherhood was a kickoff into a whole new way of living. For Tara Parker Tait it initiated a move out of Canada, a new career, and ultimately a sense of reprioritizing her life.
In today's video Tara and I chat about Motherhood: the highs and lows, what's missing and how the unknown can be the greatest ally in transformation.
PS I get a little into one of my comments and drop a F-bomb. Whoops! #sorrynotsorry
From the unknown to the known. From the I thought I knew to what the heck. And still we do it with love and sacrifice...mothers. They are incredible and the ultimate heroine. At least in my book.
It’s this journey into the unknown and the triggers from our own childhood that make motherhood so challenging. How do I get this beautiful and free willed child to listen to me and go to bed? And how do I do that without breaking her self confidence and independence? These are my mama woes.
So what I am doing about it? Besides reaching out to you for advice? I follow my practice which I share at the end of this video. I am feeling fierce in my dedication, now more than ever. Xo
It’s interesting to me to learn about other people’s stories, their journeys that get them where they are today. Lately the theme has been around food - the archetypes, my own challenges, and today a dear friend of mine has opened up to share her story - Lisa Knox.
Lisa shares how she used food as form of control and as a way of not listening to her body. We talk about tuning in to our intuition and why being a Healthy Deviant is one of the most important things we can do today.
I’m struck with how fluidly Lisa talks about her disorder and how adept she is at doing the self growth work. You can hear it in her language but also her willingness to look at her shadow side, recognize it, and make a plan on how to move through it. Skills.
Sharing this story now in hopes someone else relates. Perhaps they can find a nugget of wisdom or a new awareness that helps them along in their path. I’m trusting it will.
My relationship with food has definitely been up and down. As I share in today’s video I have tried lots of diets and weight loss behaviors, but nothing ever worked. It wasn’t until I came to realize that I was infusing my food with negative emotions and self talk that I was able to reset my relationship with it.
I still have days where I dance with food - some days not wanting to eat at all and others finding myself indulging in decadence with friends. Regardless of my actions I now have a deeper understanding of who I am and how to tune in to my body and eat more intuitively.
What I crave no longer controls me and in fact I no longer have many cravings. I am driven now by a desire to experience life, taste good food, and feel alive in my body. These are all aspects I can control myself that I don’t need to do through food.
So this is Me. My journey around food. I share it with you now in hopes it will help inspire or awaken a shift within you.
How do you use food? Yes, USE food. Because we know most of us aren’t just using food as fuel, nor do I think we should. It’s a full on sensory experience but one that is often ripe with pain, addiction, and control. I know my own journey has elements of that.
As Dana James says, “generally women have a very complicated relationship with food…it stems from how we source our self worth.” Oh boy. And how we source our self worth comes from our primary childhood wound. Yep, it gets deep.
Further, it’s a topic that we need to be discussing, sharing and healing from. As a mother I feel even more determined to look at these wounds and to address them so I can be aware of how my behavior may impact Kaliana in the future. We all want the best for our kids and healing our own wounds feels like the best place to start.
So sit down, take a little time, and learn what your food archetype is. It’s fascinating, useful, and powerful.
PS: if you know someone who would benefit from this conversation, please pass it along. I’m sure they would love to hear from you and it may be the trigger they need to take action.
Most of my childhood I struggled with my weight. It was a constant emotional battle of how I felt about myself and the food I was eating. I tried starving myself, binge eating, restrictive diets, weight watchers, you name it I tried it all under the age of 20.
The person I was, the thoughts in my head, my relationship with food...it feels like a lifetime ago. Life takes us through many permutations when we're open to it and I went through a massive transformation when I hit my mid 20s.
I share all of this now and a small anecdote of my childhood as a precursor for next week's show with Dana James. It's a bit painful but I'm trusting that through my story others may heal and perhaps stop the cycle for future generations.
Onow someone that that would benefit from this story? Please pass along. I'm sure they'd love to hear from you.
Over the last 11 months I’ve learnt so much from my little babe and listening is a biggie. So instinctual yet tricky when the words aren’t there. Just like our children learn to speak, as parents we are on a journey of learning how to hear them. And that starts on day 1.
Noises, expressions, gestures, looks and stares – it’s how we communicate from the beginning of life into adulthood. We learn what our babies are telling us so early on and, especially as mothers, we intuitively follow lead to provide what’s need.
However, when sleep is scarce and the day piles up on top of us, listening to that little voice without words can be tough. Tough days happen. But when we overload ourselves with ‘stuff’, busyness and all of the things that ‘should’ be done, our minds have no room for thought. Using that moment to stop, to breath and to THINK isn’t our first flush of feeling. It can be feelings of panic or frustration that take over and with our minds full of thoughts and things – there’s no quiet to hear what our children are telling us.
Consciously making an effort to give ourselves space to be calm and relaxed with our little ones can help us reach for our inner parent and make actions that are calm, soft and eventually even smooth.
We need to create an opening in the constant bombardment to find a moment of silence to THINK and feel true. The right choice or some guidance will arise far more easily in that moment of relaxed calm.
In the end, do what feels right and listen to your gut, embrace your instincts. We as parents know our children better than anyone else ever could – sometimes it just takes a bit more listening.
Take 5 mumma, and find the little gap in the stream to channel your inner parent.